Beaver Junction the blog

Dissertation on Celery:

I hate Celery. Celery murdered my parents, knocked up my sister, and broke my brother’s R.E.M CD!… Well I was actually glad of that last part, but I digress.

It is the worst of the vegetables, if it’s even a vegetable.

You can’t trust Celery. Two years ago I loaned Celery 20 bucks, and he still hasn’t paid me back. Celery just makes lame excuses, like:

“I’m Celery, I can’t get a job, everyone’s a vegetable bigot. It’s fruit everyone loves, not vegetables.”

News flash Celery, the reason everyone hates you is that you taste like crunchy water, and you never pay people back, and you slept with Hitler. Oh yeah, I can’t prove Hitler fucked Celery, but you all know he did.

One day walking around the Reichstag, Hitler notices Celery sitting at a little coffee shop across the way. Celery of course has one of those gay self important college boy Vandyke’s, and is reading some pretentious boring piece of literature like “The Grapes of Wrath,” or “Plato’s Republic,” or “Charlotte’s Web.”

“Charlotte’s Web” is communist drivel. Pigs are for eating, good eating at that, but I digress. So college student Celery is reading his little book, and drinking his little espresso at the pretentious coffee shop, when Hitler comes up.
Hitler: Ah, I see you like to read political literature.

Celery: Yes!

Hitler: I wrote a political book, do you mind if I sit down?

Then with out waiting for an answer, Hitler sits down straight on Celery. And poor old Celery goes right up Hitler’s poop shoot, as Hitler lets out a giant smile and a soft sigh. Then to his chagrin he sees Eva Braun across the way looking really pissed off.
Eva: Hitler!!! Not again!

Business can be a downer at times.  This week Stage 9 (a division of Disney) began to release their first slate of web entertainment.  Already in a short amount of time it has gotten a good deal of exposure through youtube and the like.  It’s a downer for me, because i had an outside chance to be a part of it, but it didn’t happen.  I was asked to pitched them some stuff at the last moment, but wasn’t able too because of family commitments.

So, i’m a bit down about that, on the plus side i just finished a new Bird and Cactus cartoon:

I too (like many other companies) am trying to figure out how to make web entertainment profitable enough to support a family.  I do think in time, it’ll allow a lot of independent producers to make a good living, but the how is the big part.  Things like google ads are definately a start.  What do you think?

This week i’ve started putting higher quality versions of my toons on a cool site called “vuze.”  It’s an interesting concept they have, to deliver standard and high def tv content via the web.

Yesterday I finished a new “Hillbillies” cartoon.  I’d expected to finish it at the end of the month, but things went much faster then anticipated.  So, as a special treat, i’m releasing it way early, and it can now be seen:

 This week I’ve also been working on some T-shirts.  They’re coming out really well. 

This week i’ve also begun to read some of L. Frank Baum’s work.  I was at Border’s the other day, and they were getting rid of some cool hard cover compilations of his Oz work.  They were 75% off each.  So we got the last 2 volumes, and i’ve been reading them.  They’re pretty cool.  If only i had the resources and time to make some 3d movies, or tv shows of the series… God willing some day.
Paul RULEZ!!!
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